Adoption for beginners


Siobhan Rowe
Focus on Adoption magazine

Am I ready to adopt?

Before you decide, consider the following questions:

  • Am I ready to love a child to whom I have not given birth?
  • Have I stopped fertility treatment and committed to adoption?
  • Am I comfortable accepting the fact that the birth family exists and will be important to the child, whether I know them or not?
  • Am I prepared to meet the birth family and have some form of communication with them for my child’s sake?
  • Will I support my child if she or he wants to search for birth family?
  • Is my interest in international adoption a wish to avoid birth parents?
  • Am I prepared to have an open relationship with my child’s siblings?
  • Am I prepared to consider adopting any siblings my child may have after I adopt?
  • Am I ready to become a transracial family that assertively pursues activities linking my child to her or his ethnic group of origin?
  • Am I prepared to be a “visible family,” and to advocate for my child?
  • Can I let go of my “dream child”?
  • Am I comfortable with the idea of parenting a child that may turn out to have special needs?
  • Do I understand that adoptive parenting brings different challenges to parenting biological children?
  • Do I understand that adoption is permanent?
  • My partner and I have a strong, committed relationship.
  • I have a strong network of supportive friends and family.

If you have answered “No” to any of these questions, it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t adopt a child, it means that you need to think carefully about the topics you have answered “no” to. Talk to your adoption agency, a counsellor, or one of AFABC’s Adoption Key Workers.