I’ve certainly benefitted from the care of some very supportive foster parents over the years, since my placement in goverment care at the age of 15. My need for care was determined by the presence of serious mental illness in the family. My beautiful and brilliant mother was a professor of linguistics at the University of Victoria, when she experienced the onset of schizophrenia. It certainly doesn’t discriminate. All of the degrees, merits and accomplishments did not matter, in the slow decline of her beautiful mind.
BC's Waiting Children
Anne Melcombe and Kirsty Stormer are adoption recruitment workers for Wendy’s Wonderful Kids.A North America-wide program, WWK was started by the Dave Thomas Foundation to find homes for waiting children and is administered in BC by AFABC. Anne and Kirsty do child-specific adoption recruitment; they match families to the needs of specific waiting children.
If we overlook single people as possible adoptive parents, we could be missing out on wonderful parents for our kids.
There’s little doubt about it, the chances of adopting if you are single are slimmer than for couples. This not only affects single people, it also means that children miss out on a loving, committed parent.
A primer for parents and parents-to-be
I’ve read about using lifebooks to help adopted children make sense of their lives. Why use lifebooks with children before they’re adopted?
Adoptive mom Carol Bolton describes how she struggled but succeeded in developing an attachment relationship with one of her newly-adopted sons.
Last year, we adopted our two sons. Though siblings, the boys had been placed in different foster homes and barely knew each other.
David, aged two, was placed five days after birth with foster parents who were very experienced and knew how to transition a child to a new family. David moved in with us first and the process went very smoothly.
Two innovative AFABC programs prove that, in many cases, there are people in a child’s existing network who are willing to adopt the child. Social worker Anne Melcombe, of Wendy’s Wonderful Kids, and Kirsty Stormer of Fraser Kids, explain how their programs work.
“You mean I have 50 people who are actually related to me! All these people are my family!” -- Eight-year-old foster child who is shown his family tree after extensive research was done to uncover it.
When we say that children waiting to be adopted have "no family" it's rarely true. Most have family--we just haven't looked hard enough.
In the adoption world, we often state that children waiting to be adopted have “no family” and, therefore, need a new one.
Choices Adoption and all BC adoption agencies, are now able to offer MCFD social workers home studies of approved families signed up with their agencies.
Openness doesn't always go smoothly--especially when a child was appreehended because of abuse or neglect.
Openness between the birth and adoptive parents of children who were in foster care because of neglect or abuse has become the norm. This sort of openness relationship can be very different to that between adoptive parents and healthy birth parents who made adoption plans for their children.
A child welfare expert, and adoptive mom to 12 children, explains how retracing developmental stages helps older adoptees heal.
During college I studied Erik Erikson, a Pulitzer prize-winning psychologist known for his work in the mid-1900s on identity and psychosocial development. Decades later, I noticed remarkable connections between his theories and parenting older adopted children. The key part of Erikson’s theory is that until a person completes one developmental stage, they cannot go on to the next stage.