Multiracial

Five things every family should know

International adoption is a complicated process that involves the child, the parents, the provincial government, the federal government, and the government in the child’s birth country. You will need to do a lot of planning, a lot of paperwork, and a lot of waiting before the journey is complete.

Edmond Kilpatrick is the proud adoptive father of two daughters. As we approach Father’s Day, we’re pleased to share his thoughts on unconditional love and the meaning of family.

 Editor's note: Cindy Packer, the matriarch of the Packer family, sadly passed away in December of 2018. AFABC wishes all the best to the Packer's during this difficult time, and we know that Cindy's kind and generous legacy lives on in her children.

Three cultures plus infinite love equals one unique family!

Edmond Kilpatrick is the proud adoptive father of two daughters. As we approach Father’s Day, we’re pleased to share his thoughts on unconditional love and the meaning of family.

Joseph is now 11 years old. He was born in Sierra Leone, West Africa. In his first few years, he tragically lost his birth family and ended up in a refugee camp and then an orphanage. After a three-year search and a two-year adoption process, he came to Canada to join his new family in Coquitlam. It has been an incredible journey for this young boy.

In this five-part series from 2006, we present the diary of Mary Ella, an intercountry adoptive mom. She shares the journey she and her husband, Wayne, took to Korea to meet their long-awaited daughter, Leelee.

Learning about open adoption

When my husband Chris and I decided to walk through the adoption process for the first time, we heard from several social workers and adoptive families about what openness in adoption typically looked like. We were adopting from the United States; in most international adoption situations, openness seemed to mean having occasional contact by letter, email or phone, which usually died out after the first few years.

An unexpected question

I thought the most difficult thing my son could ever say to me was “You’re not my real mom,” but the question that really threw me for a loop was something completely different. We were driving to daycare when out of the blue, my brown-skinned, afro-haired, almost five-yearold son said innocently, “Mommy, I was white when I was a baby?”

“Um, what? No! Huh?” Tire screech, deep breath. I figured I had about five seconds to organize my thoughts and say the right thing.

“Why do you say that?”

“Because white skin is beautiful.”

Wow.

Most new adoptive parents are between the ages of 30 and 50. That can make it difficult when adoptive parents are much younger.

Thanks to the recent publicity around celebrity adoption, some people claim that adoption has become the latest parenting trend.

That sort of comment annoys adoptive parent Laura Livingstone. As a 25-year-old parent she’s heard similar remarks all too often, and not just from people outside the adoption community.

In the third of our series, we present the edited diary of Mary Ella who is in Korea with her husband Wayne, only hours away from meeting their long-awaited daughter, Hee Young (Leelee)—at least that’s what they think…

Day No. 5, June 28

We didn’t really know what was going to happen today.