Openness

In the 23rd of our series, our mom of three kids--Emily, Grant and Lynn--is still absorbing the news that Emily’s birthmom is pregnant and wants them to adopt the new baby. It’s a difficult decision, and everyone seems to think that she’s the one who should have to make it.

I phoned my husband at work, suggested he sits down, and tell him about Alexa being pregnant. Dead silence. When he finally spoke, he said, “That’s so great! A sibling of Emily’s! Wow! When is she due?”

Two innovative AFABC programs prove that, in many cases, there are people in a child’s existing network who are willing to adopt the child. Social worker Anne Melcombe, of Wendy’s Wonderful Kids, and Kirsty Stormer of Fraser Kids, explain how their programs work.

“You mean I have 50 people who are actually related to me! All these people are my family!” -- Eight-year-old foster child who is shown his family tree after extensive research was done to uncover it.

There are still many myths and much misinformation about birth parents. Though the adoption community may be better educated than the general public, we also still have much to learn.

A year-long project, "Safeguarding the Rights and Well being of Birth Parents," by the US-based Evan B Donaldson Institute for Adoption, has much to teach us about today’s birth parents. Though the study focuses on the United States, many of the findings are relevant to the Canadian adoption community. In this article, we focus on some of the major points in the report.

We must never forget that moving a child into a new family is a life-altering event for the child. Focus on Adoption magazine asked social worker Judy Archer for her top three recommendations for transitioning children into a new family.

It is almost impossible to narrow down my recommendations to just three.

I am the Caucasian mother of a six-year-old African-American child. I am worried about explaining slavery to my daughter. Do you have any advice?

Be the first person to explain slavery to her—before the subject is covered at school and before her classmates bring the topic up. Use books to help tell the story. Before you tackle the topic, talk about the many achievements and contributions to the world by African-Americans (or African-Canadians). Then pick a time to talk about slavery when she isn’t tired or distracted. Cuddle up while you talk.

In this excerpted article, adoption expert Mary Martin Mason proposes how she thinks open adoption should work.

From their own experiences, Sandee and Aaron Mitchell knew that openness was vitally important for all their family, especially their son.

Being an adoptive mom isn’t the only adoption connection in Sandee Mitchell’s life. In fact, adoption weaves itself right through her past and present.

When we say that children waiting to be adopted have "no family" it's rarely true. Most have family--we just haven't looked hard enough.

In the adoption world, we often state that children waiting to be adopted have “no family” and, therefore, need a new one.

An adoption reunion can answer many questions. It can also change an adoptee's life in unexpected ways.

When she packed her birth certificate, some cherished photographs, and set off, Sevdin MacDonald hoped they might provide valuable clues that would lead to her lost family in Romania.

A mom discovers that her child's birth sister has no idea that they are siblings--now what does she do?

My daughter Lucy is the second child in her biological family. Her older sister Kate was adopted at birth by a very loving couple. When they were asked if they would adopt Lucy, Kate was already 9-years-old and was the oldest of four children. Though I’m sure the decision was difficult, ultimately Kate’s parents were not in a position to parent Lucy. As fate would have it, the next call came to us and Lucy became our daughter.