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Fostering connections makes adoption easier

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

Although some people questioned her decision to keep her children connected to their loving foster parents, Tara Webber knew it was the right thing to do. After all, why end a relationship that had been so good? Don’t children need as many loving people in their lives as possible?

If I thought solely of the best interest of my girls, I had no reason to break the bond between their foster family and every reason to do what I could do to encourage that relationship.

Diary of an Adoptive Mom #27

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

In the 27th of our series, our mom of three kids, Emily, Grant and Lynn, feels isolated and different from the other moms waiting in the schoolyard for their kids. Then she spots her youngest daughter, Lynn, who has been standing completely still, all alone in the busy playground.

I just don’t fit in with any of the mom groups that surround the playground after school. I really have nothing to contribute to their labour pain and episiotomy stories.

China dolls and violin virtuosos

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

Do adoptive parents' conceptions of race and racial identity change after adoption?

Raising a child of a different race than yours probably means that you’ve discussed comeback lines for all those unwanted grocery store comments with other adoptive parents.

If you’re like us, you’ve probably felt at a loss for words at times and worried how some of these misconceptions and misguided views might affect your children who are often standing next to you. 

Trust takes times for older adopted children

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

Adoption therapist Brenda McCreight explains to an impatient father that it will take much longer than he expects for his 7-year-old daughter, adopted from an orphanage, to learn to trust her new parents.

Recently, an adoptive father asked me for suggestions on how he could develop a trust-based relationship with his 7-year-old daughter, adopted internationally from an orphanage two years previously.

Have you found me a family yet?

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

Four years ago, Focus on Adoption profiled Colleen, an 11-year-old girl who desperately wanted to be adopted. The staff at AFABC were touched by this child’s clear-eyed vision of what her future could and should be. Since then, we’ve kept in touch with Colleen’s progress—as you know, each year that a child waits for a family reduces his or her chances of being adopted. We were thrilled that last year Colleen and her new family’s dreams came true. Here her social worker explains how it finally happened.

I first met Colleen when she was only eight years old.

What’s in a name? Waiting to be called Mom and Dad

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

When Tracy and Scott Hill adopted two older children, realizing that it’s not always easy for kids to make the adjustment to a new family, they decided to let the girls take the lead in what they should call their new parents. It took a while, but eventually those magical words “Mom” and “Dad”—that so many parents take for granted—started to come naturally. Here’s their story.

Adoption with the help of the Internet: Pros and cons

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

The Canada Adopts website describes itself as a place where prospective adoptive families and birth families connect. It boasts that it is the only Internet site that provides adoption-related information and a parent registry in one place.

Two adoptive parents in Calgary, who adopted their first child through a similar US service, started Canada Adopts.

The website allows adoptive parents to post a personal profile, a “Dear Birth Mother” letter, a family photo album, a description of their family, and the contact info for the agency they are working with. 

Guess who’s coming for dinner? A child’s dream realized

Source: 
Focus on Adoption magazine

Out of the blue, about a month ago, I received a call from my youngest daughter’s birth parents. They were in town on a sudden, unplanned trip from the North to the Lower Mainland, and they wanted us to get together. I immediately invited them to dinner the next night. The minute I put the phone down, I panicked. We were at the end stage of a kitchen renovation; my stove had just been hooked up, but I didn’t know if it worked yet. The house was covered in drywall dust.

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