Racism

When kids experience racism, what can their parents do? Here are some resources and tips from an experienced adoptive parent.

Editor’s note: Some of these tips are aimed specifically at white parents. AFABC recognizes that adoptive families are incredibly diverse, and that transracial adoptive families include parents from all backgrounds, heritages, and experiences, including parents of colour who have firsthand experience with racism.

In ongoing this series, we interview experts about your key questions about adoption.

Are you an expert wanting to lend your knowledge to our families? Email us at editor@bcadoption.com.

In our Living Openness series, adoptive mother Charlotte Taylor shares her experience navigating the world of open adoption. This series originally ran from 2013 to 2015.

Founded in 1998, AKOMA is a monthly get-together for adopted children of African heritage and their parents. In this interview, organizers Catherine Marshall and Harriet Fancott (who also happens to be a former Focus on Adoption editor!) explain what it’s all about.

Tell us a little bit about AKOMA.

The Lohse family first appeared in the April/May 1998 issue of Focus on Adoption magazine, where Annette told the story of adopting Mikayla. Today we catch up with them and hear about the following 18 years from three perspectives: adoptive mom Annette, adoptee Mikayla, and birth mom Lisa.

In part two, we hear Mikayla's perspective.

The Lohse family first appeared in the April/May 1998 issue of Focus on Adoption magazine, where Annette told the story of adopting Mikayla. Today we catch up with them and hear about the following 18 years from three perspectives: adoptive mom Annette, adoptee Mikayla, and birth mom Lisa.

In part one, we hear Annette’s perspective.

An adoptee reflects on black diversity in Canada and the importance of a global Black Lives Matter movement.

Racism: a Canadian reality

Here in Canada, anti-black racism is usually denied, ignored, and played down. The classic response from non-black Canadians to mentions of systemic anti-black racism and injustice is “well, there is more racism in the US than there is here”. This irks me to my core because it shuts down conversation and dismisses our experiences.

Joseph is now 11 years old. He was born in Sierra Leone, West Africa. In his first few years, he tragically lost his birth family and ended up in a refugee camp and then an orphanage. After a three-year search and a two-year adoption process, he came to Canada to join his new family in Coquitlam. It has been an incredible journey for this young boy.

Not so pacifist play

If parenting teaches us anything, it’s that our noble intentions have little bearing on reality. Before Victor arrived in our lives like a whirling dervish almost six years ago, I was adamant that we would be a No Toy Guns Household. I also secretly believed he would grow up in a post-racial “fusion” society. These pipe dreams ranked up there with fantasies like, “My son won’t watch TV, eat sugar, or play video games.” When he was around three-years-old, Victor first experienced the pop of his friend’s Nerf gun releasing its foamy orange bullet.

Your adoption-related questions answered

My father constantly makes negative remarks about black people in front of my African-American son. It really upsets me, but I hate confrontations. What should I do?